Child support should not replace the other parent’s time with their child

Children need their Dads and Dads need their children

Child support is being used as the new alimony. There are so many people voluntarily removing kids from the other parents life because things didn’t work out between them and the other parent. There are so many people receiving child support and still telling the kids the other parent don’t help as well as violate current parenting schedules and there is nothing the other parent can do about it.

Most people aren’t married which means they were already living in two different residences and had their own bills and responsibilities before a child was in the picture. Their is no reason that one parent should have the authority to place another parent on child support for 18+ years out of spite. A child’s needs should be split and when the child is with either parent that parent should be held responsible for feeding and shelter on their time because it took two to have the child.

There are so many good dads out here that aren’t even given an opportunity to be apart of their child’s life because moms won’t take responsibility for their decisions. Some are using their bodies to make money by having children and receiving government assistance as well as child support which leads to them never having to work or work as little as possible.

Situations need to be looked into more closely as well as take inconsideration that there are dads that want split custody which should exit out child support. If each parent has the child the same amount of time each month, then each parent should be able to care for their child on their time. If for some reason you are unable to, one parent should not be punished for making better decisions in life to be successful.

My brother and I were raised by our dad. I am the stepchild and my brother is the biological child. Our mom lived in a completely different state and received assistance and child support for us and never done anything for us because she left when I was 4yrs old. Our dad had to get 3 jobs just to obtain an attorney to get help and it still took 4yrs before anyone believed him. He was caring for a child that wasn’t his which was me and his son while our mother received money out of each paycheck. The courts would not listen even when he brought us to court with school documents and paperwork that showed that my mom had given his mother guardianship over me. The courts don’t listen to the people! They only read paperwork and listen to the wording of attorneys.

Now today, I’m in a similar situation with my husband. Him and his child’s mother had their own places and bills. They fell off when she was 4 months pregnant and told him that there was other possible fathers. He was torn to pieces. He continued to go to appointments even though he was hurt, but he was done with the relationship. He did not want to regret missing any moments if it was his son. Yes, results came back he was the father and she thought things would go back to normal but he felt deceived. He had helped raise her daughter and always had her with him literally 90% of the time. Once she had his son, he couldn’t even leave her house with him. She wanted to monitor all interactions and always threw herself on him. He was no longer attracted to her and told her he only wanted to help with the kids.

Well folks, that wasn’t enough for her. When she found out we were together, she made one more attempt to offer herself to him and didn’t care if he had a woman. She had already kept his son from him for 3 weeks at this time. He turned her down on Friday evening. Tuesday evening he was served with a restraining order stating that she feared for her life and claimed he was violent and all sorts of things he supposedly did to her over the weekend. Well, we were in a fresh relationship and that was literally our first weekend together and he never left my side. When he went to court, the judge understood that she had lied to him in his face but the only way to allow him to see his son was to accept the restraining order and a parenting schedule would be attached to it. He cried because he has never had a record. Well, the child’s mom did not honor the court order parenting schedule and still kept his son away for an additional 6 months. He called the police, went to the police station and they said there was nothing they could do about it. He needed to go back to court. He called his attorney and she called the moms and they would not cooperate. Next thing, DFS starting coming by the house with false calls saying he abused his son which he haven’t seen in 7 months now. She did all of this before their court date. She got him fired from his nursing job. It turned into a huge mess and now that his son is 4yrs old, he is still going thru the same issue. 

We need help to change child support law. Child support should not be another income for mom to live off of if dads are willing to take care of their children. Dads aren’t even given the opportunity anymore. So many men watch their moms struggle caring for them, why wouldn’t they want to help take care of their own children?

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